(no subject)

[gwywnnydd]

So, I'm torn. I have some beloved friends, that we just learned live -><- that far from us. They are starting to pressure us to visit.

Their house is not childproofed. I haven't been there, but I know it's not. They don't have kids, it can't *possibly* be childproofed. My gut assumption is underlined by the response one of them had when I brought up this issue: "Oh, we'll just block off access to the kitchen, there isn't anything else he can get into." Umm, no. You're mistaken.

And I'm torn. Do I continue to resist their pressure for us to go over there, and stand firm on my insistence that it's not a good environment for Bug to be in, or do I bow to their pressure, and KNOWINGLY go over to a house that will provide far too many opportunities for mayhem.

Comments

[kamiilyaan.livejournal.com]

Maybe you ought to point out your latest posts about how good your young'un is with tools...

I loved the bit about the rocking chair...

The worst that can happen is that he dismantles something, right? (or does that fall under 'famous last words'?) Who knows, maybe exposure to a non-childproofed house can help you teach Connor something new. Someone will learn something.

Ah, the stuff Kees and I get to look forward to.

[mothball-07.livejournal.com]

Are you worried about damage to bug, or the house?

If the latter, tell them you're concerned, and when they say "No really - it's ok..." say "Well, why don't we try a short visit and see how it goes?" If it's a problem they'll *willingly* meet at your place next time. ;)

If it's worry for bug, that's a little harder. In that case I'd suggest you either firmly decline and suggest an alternative, or visit, keeping a very close eye on him every moment, and let them see how much of a strain that is. They'll probably understand afterwards WHY you want to meet somewhere child-friendly.

[gwywnnydd.livejournal.com]

Damage to the house.
I know this crew enough to know they would *never* knowingly endanger a child. They also haven't dealt with a child who is this age.
My concern is that Bug, being his normal bright, inquisitive self, will damage their belongings, before I can get to him (after having shooed him away from the last shiny enticement). I would feel terrible if that happened.

[mothball-07.livejournal.com]

Then I would express that clearly (as you have here) and then accept the invitation if they still want to extend it.

Naturally you've proposed other options, I'm sure, so if they specifically want you to come over, why not give it a try? You've disclosed the likely result to them, and they're adults. They can decide having you guys over is Worth It.

If there are truly 'priceless' things, then I might back away from this statement a bit, but if we're talking about him taking apart their VCR, well, they WERE warned, and they still want you over. :)

[lawst.livejournal.com]

I agree with the short visit. If you take your extremely intelligent and inquisitive toddler to a house that isn't somewhat child proofed you won't have a chance to visit because you'll be tailing your kid all over the place.

I also agree with firmly declining. If they live that close and want to visit, then they cam coem to visit in an enviornment where the Bug can play and actually let you visit. Either that or make arrangements to visit without the Bug, but I know what a pain that can be...not just for you but any busy parent. I hate to say it, an I understand it, but people who don't have kids don't always get it.

[mothball-07.livejournal.com]

Oh! One other thought.. how about offering to help child-proof one room, so that you can relax and enjoy their company when you visit?

That said, I always prefer to have folks to my house, so I can relax and the kids can do their thing. Lots of people are relieved once they realize I PREFER this, since they don't have to clean. ;)

[treebyleaf.livejournal.com]

{boggle}
You mean looking at them in horror and saying gently, "But this is *Jay's* kid," didn't work???

[cheshyrekatt.livejournal.com]

Ahh...the challenge of parenthood.

A situation like that is a good source of object lessons on your side and on Bug's. You learn to accept that you can't protect them forever (that is a HARD ONE, I still have twinges and Chelsea is 15!)...and Bug learns that he has greater supervision when not at home....and learns to either stay out of trouble or be better at hiding it :-)

I can only offer that it isn't a bad thing to go...it can be tough...but in the long run, it will be great for both sides.

[danaid-luv.livejournal.com]

Mmm. Sounds like you've got some good advice, but I'd just be sure to point out that he's a toddler and their house isn't BugProof and something WILL likely get damaged. When they assure you it'll be fine (which they will), you'll then spend your full time there herding him away from the breakables. I've gone so far as to collect folk's 'pretties' left down and put em' up higher w/o really asking. I just explain I don't want to have to spank him for breaking their things that are left in his range. *shrugs* It's a little heavy-handed, but if they want you over, they can deal w/ it.

(Now, if you flat don't want to go over, that's a different scenario all-together and not really Bug related).